The same query returns instantly in SSMS and crawls from the application. SSMS connects with ARITHABORT ON and a .NET client connects with it OFF, so the plan cache holds two plans for one query. The query that proves it, and the fixes in order.
Restore chain errors 4305, 4326 and 3159: what the two LSNs in the message mean, which file to apply next, and how to back up the tail of the log before you overwrite anything.
This is the error every patch window can raise and almost nobody plans for. The Cumulative Update installed, the service came back, and now every application login is refused with 18401. Nothing is broken yet. SQL Server is running the second half of the patch, and it will not let anyone in until that half…
Turning every SQL Agent job off is easy. Turning the right ones back on is where it goes wrong. Save the state first, disable with sp_update_job, restore from what you saved, and know why disabling does not stop a running job.
Two stored procedures create a linked server, and on a modern instance the first attempt usually fails with a certificate error because MSOLEDBSQL 19 encrypts by default. The fix, plus rpc out, OPENQUERY, Msg 7411 and Msg 7202.
Msg 3101 means SQL Server cannot get exclusive access to the database you are restoring. Find the connected sessions, stop clients reconnecting, and retry only when it is safe to disconnect users.
DROP TABLE IF EXISTS arrived in SQL Server 2016 and replaced a three-line OBJECT_ID check that everybody had memorised. It is a small feature and it is genuinely useful, but there is more behaviour hiding in it than the syntax suggests.
ADD FILEGROUP then ADD FILE, and the trap in between: a filegroup with no files will accept a CREATE TABLE and only fail at the first INSERT with Msg 622. Placing objects, changing the default, and removing one again.
Error 26 means the client could not look up a named instance’s port. Check the instance name, the SQL Server Browser and UDP 1434, or connect with server,port.
Somebody hands you a database you have never seen and a value: an email address, a reference code, a customer name. Where is it stored? There is no Ctrl+F for a schema, so the job is to build one.